I'm feeling angry tonight...

Angry that 42% of women have experienced sexual discrimination in the workplace...

Angry that 5 years ago today 20 innocent babies were killed and our government has still done nothing to prevent another tragedy like Sandy Hook from happening again...

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This is Me

When I first heard about the #ThisIsMe online awareness campaign for #BFRBweek, I was a little hesitant. It was developed by the Trichotillomania Learning Center (TLC) Millenial Campaign with the purpose of showing the many faces of BFRBs, people of different races, genders, socio-economic statuses, locations, etc. The campaign asks people to make a video talking about themselves and their BFRB (so millennial, which I’m not… Generation X all the way, baby!). I’m not a video person… photograph maybe… blog more likely. So I decided to go with the latter, more old school, text heavy response. 

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The Fog has been Lifted

My daughter will be 7 months old next week and finally the fog has been lifted. 

The fog that has been drowning me for over a year… since the moment I found out I was pregnant.

The fog that forced me to go from being future oriented to only dealing in the here and now, I was on survival mode.

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On the Eve of the End of the Fourth Trimester

Tomorrow my daughter turns three months old. Some experts call the first three months of an infant’s life the “fourth trimester.” After making her way from the comfort of my uterus, having floated around in the soft amniotic fluid, listening to the constant swoosh of my heartbeat, and getting used to the rhythmic rocking of my body walking for nine months, she made her way into some bright, loud, wide open, unknown world. Every single thing is new. It has been my responsibility, as her mother, to help her transition into this new space. I’ve learned a lot during this “fourth trimester.”

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When my mother was 35 years old, she already had six children between the ages of six and 15. Here I am, about to turn 35, and just a few weeks away from having my first child, a daughter. It’s been a long road to get to this place of finally being a mother. I used to worry about getting older, running out of time to do all the things I want to do, but now I’m realizing that the more self-aware you are, the more wisdom you can gain throughout the years, making the life ahead of you that much less stressful and that much more joyful. 

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The End of an Era

Eighteen years ago this month, while a senior in high school, I hung a picture of Derek Jeter (and another of Andy Pettitte) from the newspaper in my locker. My brother, Jason, had recently taught me about the classic NY Yankees, and I had become enthralled by these young, talented (and yes, good looking) players, as well as the history of the franchise. I was learning what their strengths were, and excited for the 1996 World Series to begin. 

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